One morning this week, I was preparing for my time with the Lord, when I began to feel His distance. I could also sense that loud silence that I get from God when I need to adjust something.
I prayed for a while, and that didn’t feel right. I read my bible and that didn’t feel right. I could almost feel Him standing close to me, watching me, yet far from me, if that makes any sense. Finally I said ‘what is it God, what is wrong?’ No reply.
A short while later, I had to run an errand so I set out to do that and again, nothing but loud silence. I said ‘God, I don’t know what is wrong, I have done as you told me to do, I have increased my time with you, I have been diligent to study the word, pray and confess, I don’t know where I am missing it, help me!’ I was not prepared for the answer.
The Lord began to speak to my spirit and said ‘Studying My word is for you, it builds up your faith, it creates a strong foundation for you. Praying in the Spirit is for you as well, it builds up your faith and increases your capacity to receive, confessing the word of God is for you, it is building a wall of my word around you and your family, what is missing is what I desire for Me.’ He continued to speak to me, as I sat in my vehicle with tears streaming down my face. He said ‘I want intimacy with my people, I want intimacy with you, I wanted you to set aside times to build yourself up, yes, but I want more intimate times with you, with you sitting in my presence just because you love me and worshipping me just because you love me, it is you that I am missing.’
Ouch! I completed my errand, drove back to my home and spent the rest of the day with my God, worshipping Him, talking to Him, sitting at His feet, loving on Him and just being with Him. That feeling of ‘something is not quite right’ left in about five minutes and His presence showed up in a mighty way and remained with me all day long.
I am a doer. If you give me something to do, I can get it done and I won’t stop until it is completed. I was spending my days doing my studies, doing my prayers, doing my confessions while God sat patiently and waited for me. He was longing for ME and all the while I was trying to do what I thought was right. I think we, at times, try to earn our keep with God by studying, preaching, writing, confessing, etc. Yet, what He is looking for, hoping for, is a time of intimacy with us.
Sometimes I think we forget that He longs for us. We get so busy doing our best to obey God by studying His word, serving Him, praying and confessing that we forget that we are to first of all…LOVE HIM. What He wants most from us is not our effort, our diligence, our money or even our worship…what He wants most of all is us. Doesn’t that just make your mind go tilt? To think that an awesome God wants YOU more than anything else. He wants to spend time with you, He wants intimate times with YOU…that amazes me.
Matthew 22:36-38 says it all; which is the great commandment in the Law?” And He said to him, “‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ “This is the great and foremost commandment.
What God desires most of all is for us to love Him with all our heart, all our soul and all our mind. He wants you to love Him with every fiber of your being. He wants you to spend intimate times in His presence, not asking for anything, not confessing….just being with Him.
I am fully persuaded that all we have need of can be experienced and found in His presence without asking for a thing…the Bible says when He comes His reward is with Him. In other words all you have need of can be found in one place, His presence.
Today I was reminded of a season I once walked through, it was several years back. I went through a season when God would wake me up in the middle of the night, every single night. This went on for a few weeks. I would be sound asleep and I would feel Him nudge me and say ‘come worship me.’ It was winter time and it was cold. However, I would crawl out of bed, get on my knees and sing worship songs to God until He said it was enough. I could literally feel the moment He was satisfied with my worship to Him. At the end of that season His tangible presence showed up in my house so strong that people would have to sit down for a few moments when they came to visit. That presence remained in my home for months and it began with spending time, intimate times, with my God.
God is longing for intimate times with you and I today, will you make time to sit at His feet, to shower Him with love, to worship Him in spirit and truth? He is longing for you today, when you feel His tug, come away and sit at His feet…you will be so very glad you did.
